Flight of a Mockingjay
by LealeLeo
Summary: There's no going back, Katniss has to let go of Peeta, the one person who loved her more than anything.  That Peeta is gone.  Will she try her hardest to get him back against all odds, or let him go, because she knows there is no hope. . . .
1. Mutts

Peeta is never coming back. He will always be tormented somehow by the nightmares. Most happen in the day. Just the sight of my face makes him tense. I have to swallow hard, because there's something preventing me from doing so. I will avoid him from now on. I've decided I never want to see him again when I'm walking away. I begin to run. Return back to my compartment. It's late, because I can see through the little window, and the moons high in the dark sky. A deep, disgusted meow ruptures at my feet, and I almost jump. My heart seems to be pounding. As I realize this my cheeks flush, and I can feel they're warm.

"Buttercup," I say. Indifferent.

I lie in bed and don't bother putting the covers over me. Instead, I curl up, eyes wide open. With a million things I should be worrying about; only one thing is on my mind. An hour later, it's pointless to lie there. So, I get up and begin playing Crazy Cat with Buttercup. As much as I dislike him, he's all I have at the moment to keep my mind off of the dangerous ideas lurking in my mind. I play with him until my body has sunk all the way down and before I know it, I'm asleep.

In my dream, I'm wandering around helplessly through the never ending halls of District 13. When I get to one door I'm sure is the exit to fresh air and sunlight, I realize I'm gravely mistaken. I've just opened the door to hundreds—thousands of Tracker Jackers. But before I can even close the door, I feel the pain as one, two, three sting me. After that, I've suddenly been thrown back into the arena. The first one. I'm up in a tree and I've been here before, so it only takes seconds for me to assess that Rue, is in the tree next to me, and I know the all too familiar scene that is about to unfold in the forest below me. I wait for Peeta and his group of Careers to show up.

But when I blink, I'm no longer in the tree. I'm on the Cornucopia, and the mutts are biting just below my feet. I remember quicker this time, that Peeta is still on the ground. I look below and spot him, my stomach does a flip, and I scream. That's when I begin to hear the voices of my mother and Prim calling for me.

"Katniss!" I hear Prim's voice, but it takes me a while to reach it.

When I open my eyes I'm still sprawled out on the floor. My mother is looking at me with worry in her eyes. So, I sit up quickly.

I rub my head, "Sorry, I feel asleep playing with Buttercup."

"I bet he liked that!" Prim says as she rubs my back.

We hear a somewhat pleased meow from under the couch, and we begin to laugh. Prim gets up and tells me they have to get back to the hospital, but that they came here to bring Buttercup his food. Once they leave out the door, I remember the dream. My heart is pounding at a probably unhealthy rate, but I see it happen in my head before I can distract myself.

They weren't just killing Peeta. They were turning him into a Mutt. Some kind of foreshadowing intertwined with the events of the first Hunger Games I participated in.

This is when I truly accept it. Just like the Mutts, created to weaken the players during the games, Peeta has been created—or rather transformed the same way.

To weaken me.


	2. Madge

The next morning, I don't have much luck. I'm walking through the line to get my food, and Peeta stops in the line right behind me. I can feel the hair stand up on the back of my neck. Even though our skin doesn't make contact, his warmth envelopes me. I'm about to just drop my tray and leave, but something stops me.

"Katniss," he almost hisses my name.

"Peeta," I say just as a chill runs down my back.

I quickly finish getting my food and head to a table that is not my own, but no one seems to care. Knots fill my stomach. I'm about to puke, when I see Gale coming into the door on the opposite side of the room. I leave my food on the table and run to him. He gladly puts his arms around me, but it doesn't make me feel any better. Although I don't push back, I feel a tinge of guilt because I can't reciprocate the feelings he has for me. I love him, yes. But not the way he loves me.

He brushes the loose strands of my braid, back out of my face.

"Want to go hunting?"

"Yes!"

I practically run to the armory. My heart leaps at the excitement I'm feeling to be able to finally get outside. I grab my bow and a quiver full of arrows. Gale is right behind me as I'm about to open the door. But I stop. I catch my breath, flashing back to the dream.

"Something wrong?" says Gale who seems to be mirroring the look on my face.

I let out a nervous laugh, "No!" I accidentally yell.

Opening the door, I'm overcome with relief that I'm outside the over-sized underground city of District 13. We walk past the men who stand guard outside, who salute us. We simply nod and make our way to the forest.

While we're there, I hit a buck, three geese, and a squirrel. But Gale hasn't trapped anything. He stares at me. Well, not really stares, it's like he's watching me with thought. I smile at him and continue skinning the one squirrel I caught. He starts a fire and we eat the little meat it has. Before we finish, he breaks the silence.

"Katniss?" His voice is softer than usual, and it alerts me for some reason. "What's wrong?"

Am I always this easy to read? I guess so. And it's ridiculous, because before I can stop myself, I begin to cry. What is going on with me? I blame it on all the morphling. And then Gales by my side, picking me up. I begin to protest.

"What about the game?" I try to counter his moves.

"The game will always be here, but as for you, you need to be fixed up."

We're already half-way when his words catch up to me.

"Fix me?" I say offended, "Is something wrong with me?"

I can see he's rethinking his words. I try to push myself off him, but he won't let me go, he just holds me tighter.

"Ever since Peeta—," he begins.

"This isn't about Peeta!"

"Come, on you think I'm going to believe that Catnip?"

His attempt to lighten the mood only makes me angrier.

"I want nothing to do with him! He's gone, and I can't change that." I try to convince him, but my voice breaks at the end.

When I push myself away from him, he doesn't try to hold me tighter, instead attempts to help me down, but I push so hard that I hit the ground with a thud. I disregard his helping hand and make my way for the entrance, ignoring the saluting guards. I'm making my way towards the closet when I run into Boggs, almost knocking him over.

"Katniss, you and Gale are wanted in Command, we're about to have a meeting."

Great. Right after that scene. I'm not ready to deal with Gale again, so when we get into Command I sit in the seat farthest from him.

"As you all know, we've been setting out a plan to take over the Capitol and to rid the world of Snow. But there's been a change." She glances to the back of the room. And a second later, the door swings open, and a woman walks into the room. I don't know who she is, but she looks familiar. And that's when it clicks.

"Madge?" I ask her, jumping out of my seat.

That's when she answers the question that's been eating at me since we arrived at District 13.

"Alive."


End file.
